The Mean One (2022) – A Holiday Horror Review!

The Mean One (2022)

“It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas…”

Who says Christmas and horror don’t go together? Don’t tell me you don’t see the brazen terror in the overly personal interrogation from your Aunt Janice about why you’re still single and childless or your Uncle Barry making inappropriate innuendos about your brother’s new girlfriend or your mom crying into the honey ham because the holiday is ruined (again) since you can’t be more like your cousin Bea who’s given the family 3 grandkids after marrying a Prince from Monaco which guarantees she’ll be taken care of when she gets old while you’ll die alone and forgotten in a dirty disreputable nursing home crawling with roaches where the staff steal all your personal belongings all while your dad just grumbles into his mashed potatoes.

If that’s not horror, I don’t know what is.

For the 2025 holiday season, I thought it would be fun to watch another live action version of a beloved holiday cartoon. And boy, did I find a lulu.

And I mean that as a compliment.

2022’s The Mean One popped up on Tubi a while back and a friend of mine recommended it. And I trust this friend’s taste in film, so naturally I jumped on board. If you also appreciate a horror-comedy-parody-satire sub sandwich, then The Mean One is for you. I will try not to spoil anything as the movie is only a few years old and this is the first I’ve seen it streaming anywhere.

ON THE FIRST DAY OF CHRISMURDER…

The film opens with a young Cindy, from Newville, sneaking down to see “Santa” ruining their Christmas set up. And while she does forgive him, tying a little plastic necklace around his neck, her mother rushes into the room. She sees “Santa” (spoiler – it’s not Santa) and starts screaming at him, calling him a monster, and beating she shit out of him with a planter.

Unfortunately, Cindy’s mom is killed during the scuffle. And while she tries to tell the cops that a big green monster just murdered her mother, no one believes little Cindy from Newville. She grows up with nightmares, PRSD, and horrific memories of that Christmas Eve.

20 years later, Cindy and her dad return to her childhood home to spend the holiday together and then sell it. And Newville is not how she remembers it. No one decorates for the holiday, no carols are sung, no bells are jingled. In fact, the decor on their car is what gets them pulled over by the newly hired Deputy Burke. So while he doesn’t really know why Christmas decorations are outlawed, he’s gotta go with it.

And have an adorable meet-cute with Cindy.

As Cindy and her dad decorate the house and listen to carols (Newville be DAMNED on their stupid rules), they find out the hard way why the town has turned its back on Christmas.

It seems the Christmas Killer, the same one who murdered her mom, has returned. And while the local law enforcement does absolutely nothing about it, Cindy decides she’s tired of feeling like a victim and being gaslighted into thinking she’s crazy. She prepares to find the monster herself and stop it once and for all.

With the help of the local drunk, Doc (whose wife was also murdered by this monster), they prepare to hunt the creature down. But in the middle of it all, some hidden truths come to light, and Cindy realizes the monster’s reign of terror goes deeper than she ever imagined.

5 GOLDEN HATCHETS TO THE FACE!

That’s about all I want to tell you because there are so many fun moments, little Easter eggs, winks and nods, that I want you to find them for yourself. But I will comment on the aspects that make up the wonderful package of The Mean One.

This is described as a horror comedy but it also has elements of satire and parody and barely disguised as a rip-off of Dr. Seuss’ The Grinch Who Stole Christmas. I mean, the title alone tells you exactly what you’re in for.

I enjoyed all the characters. Aside from the ones that were specifically used as cannon fodder, all were well developed and relatable in some sense. Even if they were there just for the audience to hate until they redeemed themselves or got their comeuppance, I never felt anyone was superfluous or unnecessary.

The acting was absolutely fantastic, especially from an indie horror. No shade to indies, but we all know most of them aren’t bursting with high paying talent that will work for butterscotch candies from the bottom of your grandma’s purse. Chase Mullins as Deputy Burke was my absolute favorite, followed closely by Krystle Martin as Cindy.

Fun fact: Krystle is also a stunt woman so the fight and weapon scenes are extremely believable, and remind me never to piss her off. I think she could kick my ass just by waving hello.

And for anyone in the horror space who loves the Terrifier franchise and Art the Clown, then rejoice and be glad because David Howard Thornton plays the Mean One himself. David has established himself, in my eyes, as a great actor because he needs to emote from behind a mask or makeup that renders him unrecognizable (Terrifier, Screamboat, Jokers Wild.) And the makeup for The Mean One is phenomenal! Shout out to Tatjana Bluchel and Ashleigh Thiel.

Now, I’ve come to accept that 1) I have hearing aids so it’s always a bit more difficult to understand movie dialogue; and 2) movies aren’t mixed to get balanced sound for the home theater experience. So unless the audio is completely ratchet and/or corrupted, I’ll assume it’s pretty standard and acceptable for everyone else. It does seem that way for this flick. But also the production was high, the cinematography was great, and while most CGI effects were total shit, the Mean One’s mountain was rendered to look nearly exact to the cartoon but appeared absolutely real. So kudos to the f/x department on that!

Steven LaMorte did a great job of directing. The only other film of his I’ve seen is Screamboat (hilariously bad parody of Steamboat Willie) but he seems to know how to get good performances from his actors, and can frame the story well and logically. Writers Flip Kobler (also played Cindy’s dad) and Finn Kobler put together a fun story with a few good twists and a ton of genuine emotion and laughs.

HIS HEART GREW 3 SIZES…THAT SOUNDS LIKE A PRETTY BAD MEDICAL ISSUE

I will share a few tidbits that made me laugh or point at the tv and say, “ah, I see what you did there.” Cindy is listening to the news while roasting chestnuts on an open fire; the local bar is called Horton’s; every time someone tries to say the word “Grinch” they are interrupted or cut off by something. And I have four words for you: CHRISTMAS ORNAMENT HAND GRENADES.

You heard me.

Really the only problem I had with the movie is around the hour mark, it starts to drag. But this is not an indie film specific issue. Many films have trouble keeping the pace consistent and all find themselves slogging about halfway through. It’s forgivable here because the rest of the film is so damned enjoyable.

I challenge anyone to watch this and still wanna say “bah humbug” to Christmas horror! And if you’re one of those? No worries. Not everyone has a discernible palate for entertainment. Don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out. Freak.

So head over to Tubi and check out The Mean One. Unless you like getting coal in your stocking.

4 shiny ornament hand grenades (out of 5)