Jason X – The X stands for 10
Sequels, if they aren’t bad by the 5th installment, they certainly bad by the 10th. Hopes are not high for Jason X. For those still dialed in, this movie follows the abysmal Jason Goes to Hell where Jason has been disembodied and is possessing various people that are unlucky enough to be in that debacle of a movie. It couldn’t get any worse if they sent Jason to space. In the 10th Friday the 13th installment, Jason X, they send Jason to space – not kidding.
A Plausible Story
The premise is that Jason is frozen in a cryochamber in 2010. He is later discovered 455 years later by a bunch of polyester sweater wearing archeologists and an android. Being the disciplined scientists that they are, they immediately open the cryochamber. These are the things that we do that get us dead. The tiger team brings the frozen Jason on-board and departs earth on the space-faring ship Solaris. The set design, actors and premise of this movie are so ridiculous that if you are still watching you have already committed to this train-wreck.
Congratulations, you are a true fan.
Classic Kills
With no delay, the kills begin. Pissed from being frozen for 455 years, Jason claims his first victim by freezing her face and smashing it on the table. Jason finds the space-age equivalent of a machete on the autopsy table and the fun begins.
This film is rife with problems. Everything including the acting, plot and script reeks of the absurd. In the interest of finite time, it is much easier to discuss this movie in terms of the few bright spots, rather than to pick on all of the problems. Surprisingly, for all of its problems, this movie manages to actually be enjoyable. Its more like a Lloyd Kaufman Troma joint than an actual Friday the 13th film. Likewise, Jason X incorporates some really fun kills.
There is an fun scene where two of the junior spacemen are playing a virtual reality first-person shooter. Suddenly Jason meanders into the game and makes a couple of virtual kills. When the virtual world dissolves, the gamers stare in disbelief as Jason remains after the game come to a close. This time the kills happen for real; one via a epic back-breaker that would make Lex Luger blush.
Jason X – The JasonatorWe can rebuild him. We have the technology.
In another fun scene, ninja android KM-14 lays a comical butt kicking on Jason. Using a seemingly infinite arsenal of weapons and a variety of 80’s style ninja kicks, she dismembers Jason. However, in a stroke of bad luck, KM-14 drops Jason in the one place in the entire universe that can fix him. Jason lands on the the medical nano-machine table, the one machine that can make everyone’s day worse. Using nano-technology, the machine reconstructs Jason into super-powered cyborg.
The More Things Change, The More They Stay the Same
The pinnacle involves the last few survivors using the virtual reality engine to re-create Camp Crystal Lake as a diversion. Complete with scantily clad women, Uber Jason is unable to resist. The director cuts away. When he cuts back, Uber Jason is swinging these girls in their sleeping bags against a tree like sacks of potatoes.
Jason X is not Citizen Kane
This Friday the 13th movie movie is so brutally bad that it’s not even trying to be good. It does manage to be entertaining though. There are some parts that are laugh out loud funny. As far as bad Friday the 13th movies go, Jason X is a damn sight better than Jason Goes to Hell. It has more in common with Freddy vs. Jason (2003) than any other in the Friday catalog. My expectations were low enough that I managed to thoroughly enjoy the dumpster fire.
Check out this review at thatwasabitmental.com
Jason X (2002) - Could Have Been Bloody Worse - Malevolent Dark
Director: James Isaac
Date Created: 2002-01-01 00:00
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